Have you ever thought, what is it that men find attractive when it comes to women? Well, this is Heide, and today we are going to be talking about 3 qualities that men find absolutely attractive in a woman.
Now, I’m not a big fan of those anthropological studies where we’ve all heard, yes, we know men are attracted to shiny hair, we know that men are attracted to the big curves.
We know men are attracted to when you sway your hips, and you walk down the street, you catch our eye and we like you, and you know what I mean. You know we like those kinds of things, right? Well, let’s go deeper than that, because that is just surface level.
So, what really attracts us, what do we really find beautiful? In giving this some thought, I’ve come up with 3 things that I’m sure you have, and if you dial them up, you’re going to build the attraction with men.
Now, I’m not talking about the cheesy romantic novel type of passion. The type of passion that I am talking about is you sense of aliveness.
What are you passionate about in life? What are the things that you love?
Now the opposite of passion is just a lukewarm presence. And lukewarm is boring. See men, we want to see the aliveness. Because it’s the aliveness, and that life energy that is attractive to all human beings.
So the more you have of that, the more attractive that is. You think of it like an attraction meter,where passion is at the top and lukewarm, no preferences is at the bottom, and that’s boring. And when your man says, “Hey babe, you want to go to the beach?” And you’re like Sure, yeah, that’s good.
You can see what happens to the passion, you can see what happens to the attractiveness.
If he says “Hey, you want to go get some sushi?”, and you’re like, Yeah, ok, yeah.
Hey babe, there is new concert happening down at the park this weekend, you want to go check it out? Okay. See that just kills the attraction for men, we just want to see if you like it, we want to see what drives you, we want to see what you’re passionate about.
So when he says, “Hey babe, you want to go to the beach?” And if you do, let us know, and if you don’t, just say, No, I don’t want to do that, let’s go do this other thing.
But if you do want to go to the beach, just say Yeah, that sounds great, I would love to go.
Or, “Hey, do you want to go get some sushi?”, respond with, Oh my God, that sounds amazing. I’ve been craving sushi all week.
Let’s go! Show some enthusiasm, show some passion that creates aliveness, and that leads to attraction. Let your yes be yes, and your no be no. Anything in between is not very attractive.
Be playful. You know, when you and I were born, we were born with this playful instinct. All kids have this playful instinct with which they live their lives.
And I think it’s easy to lose that as we grow older.
It’s like the stress and the heaviness of life weighs on our spirit at times. Which is why when someone is able to be present and they are able to unlock that playful spirit it’s just so darn attractive.
So find ways to infuse playfulness into your dates, into your relationships.
For example, if you are going to go into a department store.
You’re going to go to Target, if you’re going to do the same old thing, like you’re on a mission, and we’re going to go and get our stuff, and we’re going to get in line, and we’re going to check out, just get in and out.
What if you infuse some playfulness? One of the things I like to do when my wife and I are out in a grocery store or a department store, I love to find the sunglass aisle,and go to the stand and find the craziest pair of sunglasses that I can find and go hunt her down, and it kind of looks like this, (He has the glasses on upside down.
Hey babe, how you doing? You looking sexy over there.
So find ways to be playful and fun in your dating experience and that’s going to set you apart.
2. Be Positive
Now, being positive is a fantastic human quality because in any given situation, we can look at the positive, and we can also look at the negative.
We live in a world that operates by the law of polarity.
There is always two sides, for every up, there’s down, for every left, there’s right.
You can’t have an in without also having an out. Right? And it’s up to us, we can choose the moment to focus on what’s going right, we can focus on the positive. Or, we can choose to focus on what’s missing, what’s going wrong, and focus on the negative.
Well, negativity is one of the most ugly qualities that we can display.
Cynicism, skepticism, it’s all forms of negativity.
And we can take it for a while, but it’s definitely not what magnetizes us to you. So how can we dial up the positive energy and the positive outlook that we have on life? Because any we’re being positive, we are appreciating what there is around us.
And when we appreciate something, by definition,that means increasing the value of. When we’re increasing the value, when we’re appreciating, we’re increasing the value for the experience of everyone who’s with us. Now there’s a couple of aspects that will really give you an edge with this.
Number one, it’s fine to be positive when it’s easy, but real value comes from a person who can find the good, who can be positive when it’s not so easy.
When you’re going to your favorite breakfast joint with your man, and there’s a line halfway around the block, and you know it’s going to be an hour and fifteen minutes before you eat, but you really want to eat there.
There are 2 ways to handle that situation:you can be negative and complain about all the people that are in line and how long they are taking to finish their meal, or, you can choose to be positive and say, Ok we’ve got an hour and fifteen minutes here, babe, why don’t you tell me a story about you that I’ve never heard before? Use it as an opportunity to connect, use it to make value in that experience.
The second aspect around being positive is when you are positive, you are naturally kind and generous to those around you.
And this is key, because as men are going on dates with you, lots of times we will watch:
- How do you treat the waiter?
- How do you treat those around in life?
- The person who is checking you out at the counter?
- How do you treat the homeless man who is on the side of the street?
Because we know that when you are on a date with us, you are putting your best foot forward. But how you treat people around you is how you are going to treat us after you become comfortable with us.
And so when you are in a positive state, and you are generous and kind to those around you, you become a more beautiful person you everyone you are in contact with.
So there you have it, the 3 qualities that men find beautiful in women.
Passionate, playful, positive.
You have these qualities in you, and as you dial them up, you become more beautiful and a more positive life experience for those around you.
So, my question for you is this? What qualities do you find beautiful in a man?
Go ahead and post those comments in the section below.